Woot Shirt does it again!

"Sperm Whales make great Seamen!"

NSFW (Not Safe For Whales)

http://shirt.woot.com/

2nd place in Derby #118: Visual Puns, with 1103 votes!

PETER, A BOY FROM NANTUCKET: A whale! I’ve sighted a whale! Aye, there’s her spout now! Just off the port bow! A whale, boys, a whaaale!
CAPTAIN BALZAC: Make haste, ye lazy dogs! Ye heard the boy! An extra ration of whiskey for the hand that kills the whale! Stand by the braces! Man the boats! Say, what kind of a whale be she, lad?
PETER: Uh… you know.
CAPTAIN BALZAC: I surely don’t, lad. You’re in the crow’s-nest; you tell me.
PETER: It’s, uh… that is… It’s a…
CAPTAIN BALZAC: Right whale? Pilot? Humpback?
PETER: Sp… a sp… It’s a sp…
CAPTAIN BALZAC: Oh, for the love of Mary, lad, sperm. Sperm, sperm, sperm, sperm, sperm. You’ll never make it in this business if ye’re embarrassed to say “sperm.”
PETER: Aye, cap’n.
CAPTAIN BALZAC: That’s just what they’re called. Sperm whales. It’s a perfectly innocent name. Let’s hear ye say it.
PETER: Uh, right now, cap’n?
CAPTAIN BALZAC: Yes, now! Sperm! Sperm! Sperm! Spit it out!
PETER: Sp-spit it out?
CAPTAIN BALZAC: SPERM! SPERM! Land sakes, boy, how old are you? What kind of seaman do you expect to make?
PETER: I beg your pardon, sir?
CAPTAIN BALZAC: WHAT KIND OF SEAMAN WILL YOU MAKE?
PETER: I’m not, uh… sure. Are there many different kinds?
CAPTAIN BALZAC: What, are ye afraid to become a sailor? Ashamed of the sailor’s life? Worried what your folks will think if ye come home with a salty mouth?
PETER: Uh, maybe you're right, sir. Could you guys just drop me off at Nantucket? I think I've had my fill of seamen for one lifetime.
FIRST MATE CHISHOLM: Captain, the whaleboats are ready! Are you coming?
CAPTAIN BALZAC: No, but I sure am excited!
Wear this shirt: sailing, sailing.
Don’t wear this shirt: as part of a cetacean-themed outfit that incorporates an exposed “whale tail.”
This shirt tells the world: “Heh! Heh! ‘Sperm.’ Heh!”
We call this color: Salty Asphalty
Thanks Woot Shirt! for another memorable piece of apparel!

Aww, Based On A Twue Stowwy

When a Nashville t-shirt designer and his wife found a mother cat and her five kittens, they all learned a lesson about caring, compassion, and Craigslist. The couple rescued them, named them, tamed them – loved them. And then, in a gesture of love that Sting would appreciate, set them free to live at other people’s houses. Except the mom cat, which they kept. And they owed it all to a snazzy graphic ad the designer made and posted on Craigslist.

Then he turned it into a t-shirt design so he could cash in on their adorability, probably without giving the cats a dime in royalties.

Wear this shirt: only if you promise to get it spayed and keep it current on its shots. Oh, and don’t let it out of the house. It’s an indoor shirt.

Don’t wear this shirt: unless you have kittens to give away. Nobody likes a cat-tease.

This shirt tells the world: “The cutest, sweetest, shnookumsest things in life are free. Yes, they are! Yes, they are!”

We call this color: Orange Tabby.
Thanks to http://shirt.woot.com/

Looking for some new shoes?

A hand colored portrait of my mom from 1943

Jeannie Chase, taken in Seattle WA, 1943. Grandma was going to send my mom's photo to Hollywood as they were looking for a new Shirley Temple, but Grandma became ill with TB and spent the next 7 years in a TB sanitarium.

You know your bouquet is too big when...

This picture just cracks me up everytime I see it.  What a fun wedding that was!

It's a Happy Birthday!!

El Burro’s Revenge from www.wootshirt.com
“Please, please! I’m telling you, the candy’s inside me but even if you can get it out it won’t be any good anymore!”

They saw their brother strung up before a bloodthirsty crowd. They watched, helpless, as he was brutally beaten to death for a handful of cheap sweets. They wept as his remains were tossed casually into a dumpster. And they swore that the murderer would never see another birthday.


Wear this shirt: to show your solidarity with PETPMA, People for the Ethical Treatment of Papier-Mâché Animals.

Don’t wear this shirt: to children’s birthday parties. Or anywhere else children might be. Or the parents of children. Just throw it in your drawer and forget about it, pretty much.

This shirt tells the world: “Not so tough when the bat’s in the other hoof, are you?”

I LOVE Wootshirt!!

Fun in San Francisco!

Had a nice time going to the PPC Northern CA Expo yesterday. I also brought my daughter and her two friends, and had a chance to visit my old UCDMC RN buddy, Michele, in Pacifica. We ended the evening by going to Fisherman's wharf and walking around, and checking out the street scene!



Heading over to the coast to foggy Pacifica!

In the 50's and foggy...typical SF weather in summer

Michele and her daugther, Katie

Annelise and her friends having fun on the trampoline!

Watching a street artist create wall art using spray paint, a paint scraper, and other tools.

Totally amazing!

Watching him paint!

The sunglasses divas!

Lights of San Francisco from my truck

The Franciscan Restaurant at Fisherman's Wharf

Check out this cool little film

This film was made by Chi Chi Zhang for her Master's thesis while attending the University of Miami. The rights were bought out by Warner Bros. I just met her today and had a great time talking to her about it and how she filmed this. She wrote this, produced and directed it, as well as doing the voice over. She said the story is true, it about a little girl, (her grandmother) and how she sees the world through her big sister's eyes. After the opening scene, it shows her sister waiting on a potential groom to come call on her. She is already 16 years old, and at that time in China, a young lady usually had someone proposing to her by age 10 or 11. Very creative, nicely done and beautiful lighting. Check it out!

This is priceless!!

My Solar Cooker!

So I bought this solar cooker about 20 years ago at the state fair from Solar Cookers International, based here in Sacramento. I think it is a great concept: they provide these "cookers" to people in Africa and other hot dry areas where they don't have stoves or fuel to cook on, and no trees left to cut down for cooking either. All you need is the solar cooker, a dark or black cooking pan, a big plastic bag that came with, like the one you put your turkey in at Thanksgiving. I had it out in the direct sun for about 6 hours when it was about 105 degrees outside. You can see the results below. Everything was very moist and tasty. Hey - we have all of this sunshine in Sacramento, might as well give it a try. The trick is, like crock pots, to get it ready early and let it cook all day.





I tried using my rice cooker to see if it would work. The results were so - so, plus the pot was not dark enough.

Bayside of South Sacramento Church

Click here to see a news clip from "Saved in the Shade", our church's annual picnic and community outreach this past Sunday.

Woot Shirt for July 23, 2009

LOVE IT!!!!

Translating words and concepts from one language to another can be a difficult and nuanced project. Ask any exchange student who’s ever tried to put the moves on a local. It’s tricky. There are shades of meaning. There are idiomatic expressions. There’s a whole world of difference between “mouth” and “grub-hole.” There are scholars for whom translation is a lifetime’s toil. People are still squabbling over what the heck the Bible says. President Kennedy may very well have been a jelly donut.

That being said, we’ve never understood why, when it comes to the complex task of translating runes, ideograms, hieroglyphs and kanji into simple English nouns like “strength,” so many people put so much trust in the first tattooist they bump into in whatever horrible little Florida town they’ve chosen as this year’s Spring Break destination.

Think about that. Some burly biker freakshow refugee told your kid sister that a certain squiggle was Chinese for “loyalty.” Now, she might have thought “wow, I wonder how he knows that? I wouldn’t have pegged him as someone who’d completed a graduate degree in Asian languages. I suppose you can’t always judge a book by its cover.”

But she didn’t. Instead, she thought “AWESOMMMMMMME, I WANT THAT ONE, QUICK, WHILE I’M STILL DRUNKENUF FROM THESE MUDSLIIIDES SO IT DOESN’T HURRRRT.”

Wear this shirt: to cover up that great big chest tattoo you’ve got of Q*Bert (CBS “Saturday Supercade” version) smoking a huge bong through his proboscis-thing. It seemed so awesome at the time. Who could have guessed you’d outgrow it?

Don’t wear this shirt: around people who actually have binary tattoos. For one thing, they might take it as an insult. For another, you don’t really want to be hanging around with those nerds anyway, do you?

This shirt tells the world: “’Regret’ does not compute”

Cool California Nights is coming up!!

Click on the banner above to get more info. All proceeds help the kids at Shriner's Hospitals. Hope to see you there!!

MonaLisaur!

I LOVE Woot Shirt!!



Ask anyone in the art world. There’s nothing new left anywhere. And if there was, it wouldn’t sell. People don’t want something they’ve never seen before. They want something they’re used to, presented in an unexpected way.

If you want to be a pioneer, you’re just going to have to accept that you’ll be somewhere that no one else will ever be. Maybe once you’re dead, you’ll be remembered. But you’ll never get to enjoy it. And in the meantime, you’re still going to have to eat.
Read more...http://shirt.woot.com/

A Sign of the Times

What a deal!

Motherhood is not for Sissies!

A cool tee shirt I found online-

Thanks to twitter buddy - http://twitter.com/typeamom

PHOTO LOVECAT: Price Matters. Price *Always* Matters.

PHOTO LOVECAT: Price Matters. Price *Always* Matters.

Family Reunion Tee Shirt for this June!

Custom T-shirt Design #85944

Custom T-shirt Design #85944



Whaddya think??

Gary Larson - my hero!

"Well, this is just going from bad to worse..."


"front porch forecasters"

Bonfire Madigan in SF!

This is my lovely cousin, Madigan Shive of Bonfire Madigan, playing at Cafe Du Nord in SF. Awesome show!!

Happy Easter!

Barbie Turns 50!!

This is too funny...I couldn't resist!

I am a proud member of Zonta International!

Founded in 1919, Zonta International is a global organization of executives and professionals working together to advance the status of women worldwide through service and advocacy. Zonta members volunteer their time, talents and money to local and international service projects, as well as scholarship and award programs aimed at furthering women's education, leadership and youth development.
About Zonta
Zonta International is a global organization
of executives and professionals working together to advance the status of women worldwide through service and advocacy. Nearly 33,000 members belong to more than 1,200 Zonta Clubs in 67 countries and geographic areas.



Zonta's Mission Statement:


Zonta International seeks to:

improve the legal, political, economic, health, educational and professional status of women through service and advocacy;

work for the advancement of understanding, goodwill and peace through a world fellowship of executives in business and the professions;

promote justice and universal respect for human rights and fundamental freedoms;

be united internationally to foster high ethical standards, implement service programs, and provide mutual support and fellowship for members who serve their communities, their nations and the world.

Join our brand new charter, the Zonta Club Sacramento Metro: http://www.zonta.org

To all of my fellow Blackberries-

Do you have an old BlackBerry® Pearl(TM) smartphone or BlackBerry® Curve(TM) smartphone that you have been thinking of trading in for a new BlackBerry smartphone?

Now is the perfect time to do so. How? Activate your new BlackBerry smartphone, send in your old BlackBerry Pearl smartphone and you could receive up to $75. Or trade in your old BlackBerry Curve smartphone and receive up to $100!

Don't have a BlackBerry Curve smartphone or BlackBerry Pearl smartphone? Don't worry, now you can send in your old cell phone and you could receive $50 towards a new BlackBerry smartphone.

It's all part of the Flip To BlackBerry smartphone trade-in program being offered by T-Mobile. You just have to activate your new BlackBerry smartphone with T-Mobile and send your old phone back to us along with some other information in order to receive your check. Trade-ins from all Carriers will be accepted. Offer is valid until April 30th, 2009.


It's that easy! To get started, visit http://www.blackberry.com/redirect/rdr?sap-client=110&target=http:%2F%2Fwww.flipyouroldphone.com%2F&mig=49C204C34507350FE10000000A659D4A



P.S. Remember, this is a limited time offer. So flip your phone today!

Font Conference!

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

I saw this on my friend Charr's FB page and LOVED it!!

The studio flooded!

So on Jan. 13, 2009, I walk into my studio and guess what? I can hear what sounded like a huge waterfall running behind my walls and I have water up to the top of my shoes! YIKES!

This was totally bogus. I quickly call my plumber, Michael, (you're awesome!) start crying as I realize what was happening, then try to figure out what to save first and take outside. arrrrghhh!


The water restoration company, J & M Environmental come to take over. They pumped out about 125 gallons of water that morning and started the drying-out process.

Thank God it was in the 50's and sunny, pretty mild for January in Sacramento.

People kept slowing down in their cars looking, as if I was having a garage sale.

This is how much soaked into the walls.



The Calvary arrives...

with lots o' energy-sucking machines to dry out the studio.

We had 4 huge dehumidifiers and about 6 mega fans blowing air around the studio for a week. Going down there was like entering a super hot and muggy wind tunnel. Some of you can attest to that.

After a week, I called my good friend and fellow photog Jonathan Orfanos, in a panic saying, "They are moving everything out of here. Now."

With a crew of 4 guys and in just a couple of hours, they had just about everything I own to run my business in boxes...going bye bye
:- (
Everything had to be moved out and the flooring pulled up before my studio turned into a mossy rainforest.

And wouldn't you know it, the sky started clouding up and turning dark AFTER everything was moved outside, and after a week of sunshine.

Guess what was under my pergo laminate flooring??

Yes, asbestos tiles from the late 50's... Good times.

This is how my studio looks when it is outside. In case you ever wondered.

So next comes the asbestos cleanup crew.

Once you get suited up, you stay in until you are finished.

One of the guys going in said he would take a few pics for me (since we weren't allowed to go in)

Quite the preparation process to enter the building

I had never seen anything like this...

How many doorways do you have to unzip to get into??

The clean up continues...


Where the broken water pipe valve was - and where the flood originated from.

Wow. Looked like a trucker's party outside my place.

And then it started raining. Do you ever have days when you feel like you can't win?


Tom took off to rent a u-haul to take our stuff to a storage unit, and the studio is officially sealed off until the asbestos abatement guy says it is ok to re-enter.

Our good friend Neils lends a hand

Of course the creek started rising.

Getting everything to the storage unit.


And then about 5 days later, out storage unit was broken into, and the stuff that didn't have water damage was robbed and vandalized.

The Citrus Heights Police were right on it.

Moving forward: My good friend and fellow photog, and house painter extraordinaire, Ian, comes over to repaint my walls. Nice job!

I guess I should have offered him lunch sooner.

Next step: New floor. Thanks to my former employee and friend, Kelly, we got a sweet deal from Tile 2 Stone in Rancho.
She also recommended professional tile installer, Patrick, to tackle the studio next.
And he did a wonderful job. I already have him lined up to do the stairs, and my kitchen and guest bathroom. The old linoleum we had just doesn't go with the new tile. You know how that goes.